Adoption Quote of the Week

"The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but out of respect and joy in each other's life." ~~Richard Bach

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Hidden Jewels


Today was an amazing day in many respects...without a doubt extraordinarily busy, but deeply rewarding.
I spent a great part of my day with Rita*a birth mother that worked with A Chosen Child several years ago. She placed her baby girl for adoption at birth, and has stayed in touch with us ever since. Her baby girl is almost four years old and Rita comes by often to pick up pictures and correspondence and to chat with everyone at A Chosen Child. Rita manages to keep her head above water, and while her life is by no means idyllic, she has a safe place to live and food to eat. She keeps and values the few people she allows into her life who she considers friends as she struggles day to day to keep her life on track. Her birthday is in August each year, and every July, she calls to find out if we will be going out to lunch and getting her a birthday cake, and every year, we do. Of the many things that Rita talks about when we see her, is her sense of accomplishment regarding her adoption almost four years ago. It is one of her life experiences that she takes pride in -- because she made the decision she felt was best for her child and everytime she looks at the pictures she receives from the adoptive family, she realizes that it was the right choice. You see, Rita is schizophrenic and requires a lot of medical supervision and mental health care. Every day is a struggle for her, and the decision to place her baby for adoption was the hardest decision she ever had to make. Yet, years later, she stands tall and proud as she shows her friends the latest pictures of her baby girl, who is not much of a baby anymore. As she picks out the similarities in their features, the length of their hair and the way they both smile with their eyes, each photograph helps Rita understands that in the midst of her illness and life's circumstances, she has accomplished a feat bigger than herself.
Rita is a jewel. She comes from a deep corner of the earth, where the sun fails to shine and the pressure is unrelenting and unforgiving -- like most precious gems, she comes from a place of darkness and moisture and dirt. Most of us will walk over those places where jewels are born, without taking the time to glance at what hides beneath the rock, beneath the soil, encrusted in those deep and dark places, covered by moss. And yet, there they are - hidden jewels - undiscovered until someone sees a sparkle of sorts and reaches in to see what's there. Once discovered, they shimmer and shine as the light hits them - multi-faceted and glorious, unaware of their own value, for like most precious gems, their beauty is in the eye of the beholder. For the holder of the gem, viewing the play of light and movement brings a new perspective and awe. One step in another direction, and we would have missed it entirely. But if we are really lucky, we will find one and then another, and another still.
Rita and I had lunch at a local restaurant and then went back to the office to pick up the birthday cake that the staff at A Chosen Child has lovingly purchased for her. She, of course, exclaims in delight that it is the most beautiful cake she has ever seen! She gives me a big hug and tells me that she is my friend and she loves me. For a moment, I am blinded by the radiance and sparkle she gives off - I realize that I have within reach a priceless gem, and feel incredibly blessed as I hug her back. She gives me a dazzling smile and is gone out the door until next time.
That is, of course, typical Rita -- she is a jewel.
Blessings and blessings,
M
*Name has been changed for confidentiality

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